Saturday, 30 July 2005

Popping the question

She had that kind of glow on her face that unmistakeably spelt love and even before she blurted out the news, I knew it. She is engaged to be married. Young and in love. And even more exciting how and where the question was popped to her. They were on a trip to Paris and what can be more romantic than to climb up Eiffel Tower with the one you love and have that Top of The World feeling. And it was there that the ring was produced, a little bit big for her slender finger, but it was fine. More importantly..the question: Will you marry me?

Awww, I almost cried, not because I was all sentimental but it triggered back memories of that fine night in the island of Penang. I remember, it was almost New Year and I was waiting for THAT phone call. It came. We talked about mundane things, nothing mushy, mushy because we were never like that. So, it was between,” Er, I met your friend Karpal Singh at The Old Bailey. He was defending this person, bla bla bla...Oh, by the way, will you marry me?”

I will never again be able to look at Karpal Singh without acknowledging his presence in this proposal. But I swear I could hear the ships hooting from the harbour, heralding in the new year and of course celebrating my moment.

While I was gasping like a fish out of water, he proceeded, “Er, if you don’t say yes, I’ll ask the next person.” How romantic.

Now that is not too bad. Someone I know actually wrote in her blog about how her intended went to the loo and asked his friend to ask the question for him. Coward!!

Oh, well, we can’t have too many romantics in this world, or else everyone will be floating in the air, with silly grins on their faces, can we?

Take this for example. Now happily married and with one cute little girl, the husband proposed while they were crossing the street! How’s that?

A friend was asked the question when she and her then boyfriend were sharing a packet of hulas - you know those ring-like crisps. One of those hulas became a temporary engagement ring.

But I am proud to announce that romance is not yet dead. Quite alive, actually especially in people of a certain age.

Not too long ago, my husband and I were asked to chaperone a friend who was meeting a cyber mate who has become very special to her. They had been conducting this online relationship, webcam, chat and all that the cyber world can offer and it was finally time to meet up. She was so nervous and needed a lot of support and encouragement and we were to offer that. Afterall, it was just natural that we were the ‘orang tua-tua’ in this situation.

So, off we went to meet them at where else, Holiday Villa for a spot of Malaysian buffet for our American friend who had flown in the day before. When they arrived, it was evident that they were already a couple – somehow, you can see from their faces, the body language and all. We ate and got to know each other. Lots of giggles from my friend who was supposed to have this very sensible head on her shoulder. Then too much giggling and nerves, she excused herself and went to the Ladies. It was then that we were roped into this conspiracy. He was going to pop the question, he has got the ring and we were to record it. He even had his camcorder with him and I have my digital. Kak Teh never travels without her now battered digital camera.

She came back all tersipu-sipu and Kak Teh was shaking in her sarong as if she was the one being proposed to. Thanks to Canon , they make very stable cameras.

The moment came. Cameras rolled. He took out the blue velvet box and opened it very slowly and from then on, everything went into slow motion. Her jaws dropped, her hands went to cover her face which was fast turning the colour of her tudung – red – and for a while, we didn’t know whether she was laughing or crying. The Kedah Malay word for it was – selop. She selopped for a long time and we were all quite worried.

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But my hats off to mature men and this one really knew how to formulate his words, even without going on bended knees. She said, “Oooh and aaah, and Oh my God!” which meant yes, of course.

So, like Karpal, we became part of this happy couple journey into coupledom. She, and she knows this, has become an important part in my life. Someone who knew me from my writing days and followed my writing career and we became friends online too. We met up and since then, she has become a precious part of my life and a source of strength for me in my journey into the world of academia. I wish her and her man all the happiness in the world and thank you for making us part of your important event.

ps Please sharelah with me how you got hitched!

PPS I have given a lot of thought to this. And have thought of the ideal way AG should have proposed to me...sitting under that big tree in front of Ho Peng in Light Street and Danny standing by the Juke box to play on cue Alleycats singing 'Hingga Akhir Nanti'. AG in flares and big Afro do would have helped a lot!


Honeytar said...

Kak sooo sweeeeeettt... :)

Anonymous said...

Our parents popped the question for us, because we were too slow. The parents met on Valentine's Day, so I guess it must have been romantic.

shidah said...

that's sweet. How i got hithed? Coming soon on my 12th anniversaries ( in August that is)

MassyLassy said...

Aaaahh! How romantic is that? It's always a geat feeling to be part of a wonderful beginning!

atiza said...

luckily he called you..or else you would be wringing his ear..

tak pasal2 AG senget telinga (sbb bengkak kena piat dgn KT)

Kak Teh said...

honeytar: yes, whatever way it is ...memang sweet. not on bended knees pun okay, kalau dah bercinta, kan?
diz: hah..u didnt tell me this.
shidah, yes, will be looking forward to that.
mas: aha...rasa macam orang tua-tua pulak. kita yang lebih terexcited.
atiza: kalau nak pulas telinga pun jauh sangat..and kena tunggu lama sangat.

Nazrah Leopolis said...

well, che anwar came over to my office, sat on the chair in front of my table, legs crossed, one hand rubbing his chin and the other holding a cig, while i was sitting nervously in my big chair excited with this oh-my-God-he-is-so-gorgeous-I'm-going-pee kinda nerves in my stomache, when he said, macam tak sengaja je sebut gitu," erm, i do not know what else to say or do short of asking you to be my wife". Ha? Tergamam saya!Kali kedua berjumpa terus ajak kawin. He rattled on saying that he knew this was not the way to do it, you know with our adat and all. I guess my rotten cockles grin plastered across my face gave him the answer he wanted. So he said, hey, let's go for lunch. We celebrated at Cable Car Sect 14 PJ, neither of us touched our food, we just sat there staring at blank space in between smiling and smiling until he had to go back to Singapore that very day.I was a bouquet of flowers, a pen that has a stamp which prints out my name, and a fiance richer that day.After that everything went so swimmingly, save for suara2 sumbang tak kasi i kawin singaporean for a while. but at the end of the day, everyone loved anwar, their very own "raja nazrin" of the family. although i think that my anwar lagi comey *biased*

anedra said...

already blogged about that.

it was a mamak roti canai shop swoons, no bended knees, no flowers, no ring (yet)...but a few grinning mamaks in the background nodding with approval..

okaylah tu kan???

Adib Noh said...

Kak Teh,

I sure missed this part of my life.Mine is an arranged marriage but with our consent.

narfnarf said...



Iskandar Syah Ismail aka DR Bubbles said...


macam kenal aje orang tu kan, kakteh? senyap dah dia sekarang kan? yelah sejak asyuk masyuk kakteh bila dia tu nak langsung? (korek rahsia ni)

Kak Teh said...

nazrah: wah dah confident siap bunga and pen yang engraved! of course dia lebih hemsem drp raja nazrin what!
anedra, what is this abt you and mamak..?
pak adib: arranged marriage with consent is fine and pls pls blog abt it!
Ayu: fly me to the moon and let me be among the stars...and then blog, eh?
Is: eh, kak teh dapat detailed report ler everyday! ...nak scoop ke? Bilik Berita Basi Jerman dah tutup nampaknya!

Empty Heart said...

must say, kelakar yet smuckingly sweet ur entry kakteh ....buat org senyum most definitely .. disebalik air mata osso can senyum ..power kakteh ..

Nie, nak tanya .. I was reading thru the sunday papers tday ..n there was an article bout london's bombing repercussion and muslims in UK .. it had the author's pic .. muka macam muka kakteh ... not that I know u before, but the resemblance in ur blog-pics ...said the author a free-lancer, ex NST/BBC journalist ... good article lak tu ..m not surprised .. is that u kakteh ?

Kak Teh said...

yes, empty heart, unfortunately that is me...aha, so someone read!

Anonymous said...


tak terkata tuan empunya jari
cerita di paparkan pula di sini
cuma terimakasih daun keladi
kerana sanggup menghadirkan diri

nota kaki buat Is :
ish..ish..ish.. ada aje dia:)


miniME said...

hi kak teh,
been following your blog for quite sometime. love ur entries, congrats to your friends, thats a beautiful story. wishing ur friends esp the one with the red tudung all the best ;)

bibliobibuli said...

Good story!

My old man handed me my engagement ring with the immortal words "Here, I suppose you'd better have this."

Anonymous said...

owh..beautiful stories..

=) just days ago i was introduced to 2 prospective ones. nothing to be malu kucing about coz, my mak angkat intention was only whispered by my adik angkat. mula2 sampai tuh, i think i blushed la jugak. hahaa.. i selamba la sembang wif the guys. i just saw ceq mak dok whispering dgn mak-mak the guys. the guys? huhuhuuu.. cayarq iman la jugak tapi, put on hold dulu la intention nieh. sedia, tak sedia, we'll see. lama lagi kot... it's just that i'm touched knowing that someone cared so much about yr future mcm ceq mak. terharu je la wif her support dari dulu.. baguih la perkara2 baik nieh dapat perhatian n restu org tua.. =)

Nadia said...

kak entertaining read indeed!! :)
mine is more like a sure thing...he confidently 'decided' that we're to be asking for agreement or anything LOL..I wonder what he'd do if i said no LOL

Ely said...

nothing much to say abt 'the proposal'. we met in san francisco, i went back to singapore, we decided to get married after 3 mths, he proposed to me over the phone, he came to singapore to marry me. he proposed to me at the airport when he reached singapore.

no, no romantic candlelight dinner and no 2 CARAT DIAMOND. hmmm, i think its time to upgrade my ring tho.

Anonymous said...

very sweet..

Anonymous said...

whole day hiking in the lake district, him behind, me concious of my big behind. balik mesia quite, 6 mths later, a letter *saudari....., sila ambil tindakan selanjutnya*

narfnarf said...

I don't have to fly you to the moon, kak teh. you're already a star yourself! :o) we all are.

Hajar said...

kak teh, when it happens to me, you'll be one of the firsts to know.. how's that? hehe.. but then maybe a longggggg wait kot... pasai org nyer pun tak dak lagi. hahaha...

Lollies said...

ah syioknya cita kawin-kawin ni.

ada cerita nazra lagi.

Ashlee said...

i was looking at your blog and i just thought that you have a real cool blog. See my postings in my profile. Holla back friend!

Justiffa said...

hi KT. this has given me an excuse to reminisce lol... macam tgk gambar lama2. berdetik balik keresahan & kegusaran dup dap dup dap. i can almost feel the fire rekindling.. maklumlah bila dah almost 22 yrs together dah agak sluggish lol ;)

ntah i cant really remember bila he specifically popped me THE question. we were in love and it was just a natural progression i guess. xcept that he kinda helped things along when he came back from the states after only 1 semester there with the sole mission of bringing me along... as the missus. mengeluh org tua2 too short a notice lol.

Sidah Salleh said...

he just arrived and settled into his hotel room. we walked out to go for lunch when he stopped me. "i'm afraid i might lose it, so here it is..." taking out the small box from his pocket. i wasn't sure but i said yes anyway.

hana_kirana said...

sweet... :)

Btw, Kak Teh dan Alleycats memang tak dapat dipisahkan.. :)

Blabarella said...

Sighs... So romantic!!! Me, sorrylaa .. hubs is loving, but somehow we never did the whole "will you marry me" thing. Guess that's because we were already in coupledom for a good TEN years before kahwin!! LOL

Anonymous said...

ooohh...cite kawin. my favourite. well...i had a whirlwind romance. in the second month my hubby casually said "so when are we setting the date for my parents to go over?" I was quite stumped..."that was a proposal???"

I never let my huby forget that I never got a decent proposal. I'm lucky he didn't just club my head and say "me hubby you wife" hahahaha

Anonymous said...

kak teh,

Ketika itu gerimis.Dalam remang-remang senja.Di jeti kuala. Melihat bot-bot nelayan berlabuh pulang. Camar berterbangan. Deru angin berhembus nyaman.

Kami berteduh di bawah pokok rhu. Berpegangan tangan.Pipinya yang basah diusap perlahan.

"sudikah dikau menjadi permaisuri hati ini..?"

Dia tertunduk malu.Tersipu. Kemudian, mata bertentangan.Jawapan di karang. Tak terucap menjadi perkataan. Dari redup mata itu, segala-galanya bagaikan sudah menguntumkan restu.

Itulah kisah dari drama tv.

Kisah sebenar. Cuma satu panggilan telefon.

"Yang, bila nak balik kampung? Mak nak datang rumah."

..dan gerimis terus mencurahkan rahmat sekelian alam.


Kak Teh said...

buat rojak jambu batu,
pedas sungguh macam nak marah
cincin disarung, keluarga dah restu
bila lagi nak dapat kad merah?
minime: we will wait for THAT day - kalau dia tak invite kita JAGA!
sharon - goes to show - they are just so bashful, arent they? or nak ajaga macho image? hehe
lilheaven - must let us know when!! kita buat cyber kenduri! kak teh nak tempah baju berlabucci.
nadia..hehe - its nice when youa re so sure of each other..then and until now, kan?
ely, bila dah upgrade ring tu..tunjuklah sikit kat blog.
anon - thanks.
bollywood babe - very the formal! macam surat saman!
ayu...will want to hear abt yr trip to Cloud Nine!
LadyJade - yes!!!! pls let me the first to know..and will blog!!! cepatlah sikit, okay!
lollies - ni cita feel good factor...

Kak Teh said...

redkebaya - wah 22 tahun..almost as lama as mine. We've been married 25 years - Alhamdulillah.
petaling street - hmm, another bashful one!
hana_kirana: how can? macam lagu tiada nada, macam itik tanpa air, macam burung tiada sayap lah!
blabs - good what, when you feel so comfortable already..for us - hish...what a new world coupledom!
anon: thanks for sharing! so many different ways they pop the question and banyak yang tak direct!
po; *sigh* if only ada orang tuliskan script!

Ashlee said...

kak teh,your page simply caught my attention..Just dropping by to make a short statement bout your blog..uhm i think that your blogs are cute and awesome.. Hope to hear from you..

GorgeouslyGeorgina said...

Hey, awesome postings!! I have also posted new blogs! Yah might wanna check them out now..My webpage is also burnin for some cool stuffs!

Sidah Salleh said...

kak teh... yang tu tak jadik lah. long story. maybe the ring ada curse kot. hehe...

Sunfloraa said...

He got on his knees to ask me to marry him with a ring. My answer was, "In due time." gelak dia. He said it was the most unromantic answer. I said I was merely being practical.

Kak Teh said...

ps - never mind.but did u keep the ring? last, one man, on bended knees and you had to say, "in due time"? of course we know the answer lah!

Anonymous said...

My husband proposed in my small red Kancil, 3 days after my birthday. (or was it me who proposed to him?) Dia kata, dia ada ambitions to do his master and phd. And I asked him, am I part of those ambitions, and he said...Of course.

Well then, I told him to ask my father, so we arranged to meet at one nasi kandar restaurant (charged a bomb). I punyalah tunggu dan tunggu, tak tanya2 lagi. Sampai the second I had to get up and go to the loo, baru dia bukak mulut and tanya my father. So, what to do, takkan nak duduk balik kot. Had to go to the loo, and in the end, miss the whole proposal thing!

Sidah Salleh said...

kak teh, of course silly me returned the ring. kalau jual pun takpe ye... hehe...

Ruby M. said...

ahhh i finally get the whole story!! congrats to that couple..ehem ehem.. i still want to see the full pic!!!!!!!

p.s : i didnt win the alleycats cd! uweekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!!